Sonntag, 6. Dezember 2015

A new project... Turning my life around, quitting my job, looking for meaning in life...


Hello Lovelies, 
this will be a really personal post, I don`t do this on here often, like never, 
but I need to find out where my life is heading right now and want to share it with you somehow...

So what have I done?
I quit my day job I had for 13+ years!
And now I am unemployed for 6 days and freaking out big time!!!

I never was happy in it but you have to get your money somewhere, right?
And I was never unemployed, I worked for 17 years straight!
I had this job since I went to school.
After I mastered my standard education I went for a more creative one, like in interior design, but never found something in this field, so I went to uni and got my diploma in Graphic Design, never found a job there either.

So I kept working in my miserable job I had since 2002. 
In 2010 I became a Head of Department in my field.
Had 10+ employees, made a ton of money and became miserable every day a bit more.
I got sick, really sick, found Veganism and got better (this is a whole other story, but everything is interconnected though)
After I went Vegan almost two years ago I started to connect the dots more and more between mass consumption, animal agriculture and exploitation of animals and humans.
And like almost every big sales oriented company mine were no difference.
The choice was mine, change it, or leave it.
And this is what I did. This year in November I quit!
So what do I want now?


My answer all my life, since I was a little kid is I want to paint! I want to be creative, I want to make something with my hands! I want art be my life!!!
Everyday I get up this is what drives me, paint, art.
Even I can`t live of my art yet! This is what I wish for and dream for everyday I get back to bed.
When I make art, I don`t need food or sleep, I breath and live it.
And it was & ever did when I was miserable at my day job. 
This is what kept me alive...
This is what keep me sane...
When I make some breaks from creativity I feel so miserable too, I think some of you can relate to it? Do you?

What is the other passion besides art?
It is sport, all kind of sport, movement, dance, aerobics, running, fast sports like skiing, or simply get on my road bike and get some distance on it.
And yoga, which played a big part in my life ever since.
(what helped me heel from my disease)

Next year I will be attending school and get my yoga teachers license.
I will hopefully be a really good yogi and maybe go to India, which is a big dream...
But this does not solve my problem at the moment, right?
I am still unemployed and when you have time, you get to think what will come and what is now, all the crazy thoughts in your head start to spin and when you don`t pay attention it will drag you down...

Now I am writing some applications to get a small day job to get a little money...
And search fore some more inspiration like in this book... It really helped.


If you haven`t read this, go on and do so, it is a really good one.


So all I need to do now, if find one that make some money for me right? :)
The creative and the in shape parts are covered...

What is my inspiration right now?
Hmm, Im kind of into more modern style of painting.... some fluid, organic, not this accurate detail loving style I was in before...
I like it a lot, don`t know where it will lead me in the future, all I can say that it is so, so much fun!
.
So now I am painting modern art...


I will paint my kind of style art anyways, like the portraits I did in the part, but looking forward to do an exhibition with the new stuff I am on.
So I found a gallery where I can sow my art, hoping for the best, right?


All people have to do is be grateful for what they have! And everything will work out just fine right!

And I am!
I am thankful for my family, my loving and supporting hubby, my furry babies, my friends and thankful for myself, that I keep this positive attitude all the time, even when I am freaking out I know that everything will be good in the end and all will work out like planned and if not at least I tried and did the best I could!
Also I am thankful for my art! For painting!
Be thankful for everything that drives you!
And you have to take chances! Just try to do better.

So what is the conclusion?
I have to get my shit together I suppose! ;)
I have to be patient!
I have to work hard!
I have to be thankful!
I have to give all I can!

Thank you for reading this, for listening to my thoughts on this part of my life...

Lydia

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